Beth's Contradictory Brain

Recent Readings

I'm still really trying to put my library card to good use.

I read Covert about the mob in New Jersey in the 70s and 80s and a man who was undercover and then when all that was over he ended up an NBA ref. It wasn't the best writing, but it was such a good story it was fun to read. I actually learned about the book on the only morning radio show I've ever liked - Elliot In The Morning. He had the author on for an interview one day.

I think I first heard of John Scalzi over on Instapundit and then saw a link to his blog, which is a really good read. (On my short little blogroll I've got 3 authors. I guess it makes sense they've got good blogs.)

I picked up the first and third books in Old Man's War and put the second on reserve. I also picked up Android's Dream which ended up being a really fun read.

I'm not the best at retelling plots or summarizing stories - so check out the links to get good synopsis of the books.

Little Update and Reading About Stalin

Not much going on really. We had a totally lazy weekend, which was just fine after all the ickiness of the previous one.

I got my car back from repairs today. I must say Progressive rocks. The car looks new - they cleaned it inside and out and everything. Nice.

I finally finished reading a really long book about Stalin. In spite of having a college education, I've learned a lot more about fascism and the "mood" of the world in the 30s and 40s. I'll never understand why it seems to be ok for leaders to kill millions of their own people, as long as they don't start killing people in other countries.

Too bad my library doesn't carry this book of letters between Stalin and Roosevelt. Roosevelt and Churchill had to have known Stalin was killing millions of his own people through starvation, and so many other through relocation and camps, and mass shootings - yet they worked with him against Hitler. What a mess it all was.

Along those lines, let me say something I'm sure is totally not PC. But why don't South Koreans do more to free their friends and family members in North Korea? It's a sincere question. Has so much time passed since the country was cut in half that now "it's just the way it is"? I know so many people were suddenly cut off from family members caught on the wrong side... wouldn't it be worth the effort to free North Korea?

Eventually I'll do some reading on Chiang Kai-Shek and Mao.

Poor Nerdstar has had to listen to me try to come to any understanding of all that history.

Other than that I'm worn out by the news and politics and really should pay less attention to it all.

Readings

I love the library for the same reason I love Netflix - they allow you to read/watch things you wouldn't normally invest in.

I only got three books yesterday, but as a result I'm building a new reading list. Things I'm kinda interested in, but wouldn't buy.

Also, yesterday I did something I haven't done in a long time - I read a book in one day. A long ago friend of mine was/is a Martin Amis fan. I never could get into his stuff. But one of his caught my eye yesterday, so I checked it out - House of Meetings. It was really good. And I guess having seen The Lives of Others recently, helped it resonate with me. So now I've got three books about Russia on my new reading list.

The other two books I got were a bio of Nixon and Reagan's letters.

One book I did buy a little while back is the complete works of Flannery O'Connor. Man are they hard reading. None of them have anything happy happen in them. A few of them I don't even begin to understand. I've never been big on deep analysis of written works. I tend to think that an author wants you to know what the point is and therefore doesn't hide it too deeply. But her stuff... man...

Re-Reading

This quote from Poppy Z Brite really says what I've discovered about re-reading books lately...

I've been doing a lot of rereading of fiction...

Tomorrow, of course, is the in-store date of Stephen King's new novel Duma Key, and I'm falling on my knee praying that it will actually be in local stores. A reviewer friend kindly (if, I suspect, quite illegally) sent me an e-file of the novel months ago, but I manfully resisted printing it out and reading it. I want a book, not a bunch of words on a screen, not a pile of manuscript pages, but a gorgeous hardbound new-smelling book I can crack open and smooth back the pages and know that, no matter how many times I come back to it in the future, this will be the only chance I get to read it for the first time ... though I sometimes think I actually prefer rereads to first reads; on the first read, I tend to rush, to get grabbed and dragged along by "the gotta." Rereading frees one from the tyranny of plot and allows for a more luxurious pace, closer attention to the details and the language and the sheer pleasure of the author's voice.

For a while now I've taken some favorite books to work with me to re-read at a very slow pace - usually twenty or so minutes at lunch every day, and maybe another twenty or so if I've ran out of everything else to do at work the last slow hour.

These slow reads allow me to not only enjoy a lot more plot details, but it's also given me a chance to really "get" the author's voice and how it compares to other authors.

Of course, for me it also helps that it's been a few years since I've read the books and have therefore forgotten even some of the bigger events in them.

I also feel the same way about reading an actual book as opposed to a print out or something on a screen.

Ponderings

I finished reading Dark Star Safari early this morning so I could include it in my package to Nerdstar today.

It wasn't an easy read and probably contributed to my down in the dumps mood the past few days. Theroux writes a lot about the contrast between Africa when he was there 40 years ago and now. In those 40 years there have been untold billions in aid given, hundreds of thousands of people have given years of their lives - or in some cases, their actual lives - to volunteer and teach and build and give and give and give. Yet there really isn't anything to show for any of it. He writes stories illustrating the corruption, but more importantly, how it's the aid itself that leads to, for lack of a better word, a complete laziness and void of motivation on the part of Africans.

He promotes the simple solution of ending all aid thereby causing the Africans to have to choose between staying in abject poverty or doing for themselves. He writes several times about how there are so many native doctors and teachers and so on trained in Africa every year, and yet at the first chance they abandon their country to go anywhere that will pay them more money, leaving behind aid workers to fill those positions. If Africans don't care enough to stay and work in and help their own country, why should those countries be proped up by aid?

I have no idea how many elections, coups, overthrows, etc. that have happened on that continent in my lifetime. I have even less understanding of all the issues that make it all such a failure.

Reading the book has led me to ponder to comparisons, America and Africa, and Iraq and Africa. Theroux's book could/should serve as a stark warning of some major mistakes that could be made in trying to promote a democracy in Iraq. What it comes down to more than anything else is do the Iraqi's want a true democracy? And if they do, are they willing to go thru the struggle, take the responsibility, and resist those who would hinder the outcome?

Theroux often talks about how he would be content to live a very simple, removed life teaching, or now even just writing, in a small village. I can understand the draw of that kind of life - although I'd prefer it to be in some small mountain town in the Northwest. I can understand people who are content to live simple, self sufficient lives. I can not understand people who feel entitled to be handed things they are unwilling to work for.

More than anything, I take from this book an absolute wonder that this outrageous ideal of democracy works in America. No, it hasn't been a perfect storyline, there are many dark spots in our history. But, as a whole we've gone thru them and come out even more democratic.

If you have any illusions that America has become a fascist state - read Theroux's books about what one really looks like.

Dark Star Safari

I'm right in the middle of reading Dark Star Safari by Paul Theroux and am totally captivated by it. He travels over land catching any ride he can from Cairo to Cape Town not only telling us stories of the people he meets and places he stays, but giving us a detailed picture of life in Africa that might as well be another planet.

As a kid I would lay in bed at night and think about all of the people in the world. I would try to imagine the people on my block, then in my city, then all the other people in their beds in the US and then people who were starting their day on the other side of the world. I used to watch planes out of the classroom windows and wonder where the people were going. As I've mentioned in my writings about why I blog, I'm a total voyeur at heart. I love to eavesdrop on conversations, watch people who aren't aware they're being watched. So I find it utterly fascinating to read accounts of lives that really couldn't be more different than mine.

Even though being born in this time and place is something I'm always thankful for and don't understand in that big picture sort of way, this book really reinforces that gratitude in me.

If you have any interest in Africa and all the various countries there and the lives of the people there, or if you're tempted to be a relief worker, or if you just think America sucks - read this book.

Here are more formal reviews of this book than mine.

Current Reading

I love when I find new authors! I judge a lot of books by their covers and titles. When wandering around a store like Barnes and Noble with no title or author in mind, it's as good a way as any to find something good to read. I couldn't have gotten luckier when I picked up Good Omens. I love Neil Gaiman's writing. I just finished Stardust the other night and it was one of those books that actually made my week better. It made me more light hearted and optimistic. How often does a book do that? I'll probably pick up American Gods this weekend and then look into getting the Sandman series.

I haven't gotten the new Harry Potter because I find it just doesn't interest me. I'd probably be just as happy if someone told me the basic plot line. All those pages don't seem worth my time.

Michele does a much better job of Gaiman vs. Rowlings today.

And because the phones are so slow in the mornings when I have to cover the front desk, I'm rereading Jitterbug Perfume by Tom Robbins. I first read it about four years ago, just enough time has passed for me to have forgotten enough details to make the rereading interesting without having to want to rush thru it to see what happens next.

Friday hodgepodge

Like everybody, I'm very happy it's Friday and that I can sleep late tomorrow. It's all of 34 degrees here, but no snow - way unfair! There's a chance of snow tonight, but it would only last until mid morning anyway. It's funny how some people really hate cold weather and some really hate warm weather, but we don't necessarily live in the climates we love. If and when we move out of Austin, Nerdstar and I both insist it be to cooler climates. If my body is never in temps over 85 again I'd be perfectly happy!!

It was cool on ER last night to see them Googling the blind date guy after writing about that the other day!

I'm still reading Atlas Shrugged, maybe I'll finish it this weekend. But it's tuning my brain in to all the subtle ways people are anti personal achievement, anti rich etc. So it got me to thinking over dinner last night about lottery winners. It would be cool to do a documentary of people who have won over $10 million (in my mind more than enough to buy a couple of houses, a couple of cars and not have to work). What were their views of "the rich" before winning? Do they now consider themselves part of "the rich"? Do the lottery winners contribute as much to charity as "the rich"? Things like that. I think it would be very telling. I think sometimes athletes are kinda like lottery winners - they still carry the image of growing up poor and being poor long after signing multi-million dollar contracts.

Tonight is going to be a snuggle by the fire kind of night! Nerdstar has drill this weekend and has to get up early - yuck!

More on MKL, Jr.

I finished reading Stride Toward Freedom last night. A couple of things really struck me.

The first being that this is a book that should be required reading in every high school. The probable reasons it isn't are rediculous. The first I can think of is that King refers to "african-americans" as Negros throughout the book. We certainly can't have that word used in any context in the public schools. (I'll save my tales of trying to teach Huck Finn in high school for later.) The second is that his whole philosophy, and therefore actions, are based on his deep faith in God and his desire to bring about social change thru Christian love. Another topic we absolutely can't have in our public schools. It's absurd beyond belief.

The second thing that really struck me was how long and hard a struggle it was to simply enforce the Supreme Courts rulings on desegregation. King himself talks about how the federal courts were really the only part of the government to try to do and enforce the right thing. The president and congress, not to mention governors and local courts, were pathetic.

Not knowing my history, I wondered who was president during all this mess in the 1950s. This morning I looked up that it was Dwight Eisenhower. How sad that a war hero president didn't speak out more often and more strongly about the process of desegragation.

Now I'm curious as to how we as a country went from the amazingly noble civil rights movement to a welfare/entitlements/affirmative action era.

Anyway, Stride Toward Freedom is a short, easy read that everyone should take the time for.

Ayn Rand and Martin Luther King, Jr

My last day in Sacramento we had a fantastic breakfast at this little diner and then headed across the street to a rare and used book store. Since I started reading The Light of Reason, I have been wanting to read Ayn Rand’s non-fiction works, but wasn’t really planning on reading any of her fiction. I was under the false impression that they would be boring and hard to read. Last Friday I purchased three books, We The Living by Ayn Rand, Stride Toward Freedom and Why We Can’t Wait both by Martin Luther King, Jr.

I read We The Living Friday and Saturday. In the preface she describes it saying, It is a story about Dictatorship, any dictatorship, anywhere at any time, whether it be Soviet Russia, Nazi Germany, or - which this novel might do it's share in helping to prevent - a socialist America. What the rule of brute force does to men and how it destroys the best, will be the same in 1925, in 1955, or in 1975 - whether the secret police is called G.P.U. or N.K.V.D., whether men eat millet or bread, whether they live in hovels or housing projects, whether the rulers wear red shirts or brown ones, whether the head butcher kisses a Cambodian witch doctor or an American pianist.

She states, When, at the age of twelve, at the time of the Russian revolution, I first heard the Communist principle that Man must exist for the sake of the State, I perceived that this was the essential issue, that this principle was evil, adn that it could lead to nothing but evil, regardless of any methods, details, decrees, policies, promises and pious platitudes.

I then started Stride Toward Freedom yesterday while driving. I could never have imagined how much these two books have in common!!

Even just reading the first fifty or so pages of Stride Toward Freedom I began to see the comparison between the affects the oppression of communism and the affects of the oppression of blacks post slavery/pre civil rights. How they wear down the soul and break the spirit. (What a fantastic college paper that would make if I were still in college, except that I can’t imagine what class that topic would be found in.)

So, tonight I’m reading Martin Luther King, Jr.’s thoughts on communism/Marxism. He gives three reasons for rejecting the ideas of Marx and Lenin:

First, I rejected their materialistic interpretation of history. Communism, avowedly securalistic and materialistic, has no place for God. This I could never accept, for as a Christian I believe that there is a creative personal power in this universe who is the ground and essence of all reality - a power that cannot be explained in materialistic terms. History is ultimately guided by spirit, not matter. Second, I strongly disagree with communism’s ethical relativism. Since for the communist there is no divine government, no absolute moral order, there are no fixed, immutable principles; consequently, almost anything - force, violence, murder, lying - is a justifiable means to the “millennial” end. This type of relativism was abhorrent to me. Constructive ends can never give absolute moral justification to destructive means, because in the final analysis the end is pre-existent in the mean. Third, I oppose communism’s political totalitarianism. In communism the individual ends up in subjection to the state. True, the Marxist will argue that the state is an “interim” reality which is to be eliminated when the classless society emerges; but the state is the end while it lasts, and man only a means to that end. And if any man’s so called rights or liberties stand in the way of that end, they are simply swept aside. His liberties of expression, his freedom to vote, his freedom to listen to what news he likes or to choose his books are all restricted. Man becomes hardly more, in communism, than a depersonalized cog in the turning wheel of the state. This deprecation of individual freedom was objectionable to me. I am convinced now, as I was then, that man is an end because he is a child of God. Man is not made for the state; the state is made for man. To deprive man of freedom is to relegate him to the status of a thing, rather than elevate him to the status of a person. Man must never be treated as the means to the end of the state, but always as an end within himself.

I was going to say that it’s fascinating that two people as different as Ayn Rand and Martin Luther King, Jr. can reach the same conclusions from such different paths. But really, oppression is oppression, and those who fight it and rise above and beyond it have much more in common than not.

Sorry this is such a long entry. I didn't know of a way to break it up into smaller ones.

I don't know what brought these books to my attention, or why now, at the beginning of a year that holds such potential for good and evil. And I'm sure in all of this my thoughts are also influenced by having seen "Lord of the Rings, The Two Towers" and having it reinforce the ideals of loyalty and dedication and friendship and sacrifice and yes, good versus evil. (Yes, I cried thru the second one just like I did the first. The only reason my heart won't stop while watching the third film in the series is I know how it ends!)